"Walking with a yellow star on my coat, some woman spat at me....You have to look straight through people like that, without seeing them, or else how could you bear it.....They came to watch us at the station; they expected wailing and crying. We had a dignity which made my heart overflow with respect."
So I did it. Went in model's room in Dean Street.
Big breasts blonde in Carnival again. Plus big new long black-haired girl, with green shockwave tattoo round bottom. Big voluptuous bottom, in black ski-shorts over white knickers and bra. Great dancer, sensational big girl, big hips, big bottom. Her bottom dancing in front of me.
I had a permanent erection in Astral but you don't really see anything.
I go to prostitutes. Whatever turns you on. Prostitutes turn me on. That's what I want.
I've done it now. I can do it whenever I want now. I am Wedekind. Toulouse Lautrec. Van Gogh.
Saturday, 6 March 2021
"Walking with a yellow star on my coat, some woman spat at me" (6th March 1997)
Labels:
astral,
carnival,
dean street,
prostitutes,
sex,
soho,
virginity,
yellow star
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There is some humanity in my brain, and she grabs hold of it and pulls it out so I can be human and warm in that room; but outside it drifts...
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I want lots of money so I can go to models all I want. So I can see new gold dress dancers all I want. Just four more weeks to get through. ...
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